As soon as the clock hit midnight, I suddenly became overwhelmed with a variety of emotions. I stood next to my best friend, who has been by my side for a majority of the good, bad and ugly of high school, and she looked at me with a “holy crap, this is our year” look in her eyes. I looked back at her and said, “This is the year it all happens”.
Growing up I was always told that I was the class of 2019. Back in 2006 when I was a kindergartner it felt like a lifetime away and in a sense it was. My whole life up until this year will have revolved around a school calendar. When people used to ask me about who I am, I would say “Well, I’m a good student”. My identity was based on this concept of being in a classroom where I am constantly graded and monitored because that is all I have known. That is why I think it is crazy that when I tell people I don’t want to go straight to college they are appalled. I have been trapped in the California School System for 13+ years. Why is it such a shock that I want to find myself outside of that? I need to learn through experiences rather than in a textbook for the first time in my life. In 2019 I will do that.
It will be a big year but it is not without thanks to this past year. 2018 was hard, but it forced me to grow beyond the limits that I set for myself. Last year I learned what it takes to be a good friend and I learned who mine are. I worked two days at a job that made me feel like the worst version of myself. That experience opened the door for me to get a job where I can thrive, where I feel loved, appreciated and cared for. I stood up for myself. I tried new things. I had doubts about my faith, but was constantly reminded of God’s love in times of pain. I fell and I got hurt. I spent days in my bedroom crying over a boy. Then I learned that my value and my self worth is not dependent on his (or anyone’s) opinion of me. I got out of bed and I did the best that I could. Some days sucked but those are the days that made the good ones even better. I am proud of who I became in 2018 and I look forward to continuing to grow.
I’ve never been one to set resolutions, but with this year being so momentous, I feel it is almost necessary. I’d rather think of them as goals. Some are bigger than others and some may seem very simple, but they will hold me accountable and inspire me to work hard everyday.
- Graduate with all A’s: This should be fairly easy due to my easy work load but I need to stay motivated through this last semester.
- Move out: It doesn’t matter where to, as long as it is somewhere.
- Explore NorCal: I want to see more of the area I’ve lived in for my whole life before I move somewhere new.
- Save money: This means finally opening a separate savings account and not eating out everyday!!!
- Practice minimalism: Get rid of unnecessary clutter and only buy what I truly need.
- Travel abroad: Go to at least one new country.
- Take more road trips: Even if it is just a couple of hours away.
- Be healthier: The most iconic resolution, but I just want to feel better inside and out.
- Attend church regularly: Find a way around my work schedule.
- Write regularly: Gain a blog following
“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”Eleanor Roosevelt