My life is nothing exciting. Most days I wake up late. Rush to get ready. Go to school. Come home. Some days I work and others I just watch Netflix or go to my friends house. I go to bed and I do the same thing over again. I’m in a constant state of repetition. With that, I become lazy, unmotivated and moody. It is not a part of me that I am proud of.
Recently, I went on a trip with my two best friends and I realized that I feel my best when I break this day to day routine. I have more energy and I am more pleasant to be around. We drove all down the central coast, spending hours of the day exploring new places. Every night was a different house with a new bed and something exciting around the corner. We were not too far from home, but we felt as if we were a world away. It was our first time travelling without an adult and one of the first times, I felt truly independent.
The whole point of this trip was to see colleges and the places that I may want to live after graduation. I hoped to come home with more clarity about my future and in fact I did. It was just not what I expected. I wanted to come home and suddenly know where I was going to live, how I could afford it and what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. Instead, I was reminded of what it felt like to be myself and let go of the routine that holds me back. I was the me that I try so desperately to be all of the time.
Coming home has been an odd transition for me, even though I was only gone five days. Somehow I am expected to get back to a schedule. I have places to be and people to answer to. I’m tired of feeling like I am hostage to a clock. I want to do the things that make me happy now. I don’t want to sit here thinking about tomorrow. I want to spend each day full of hope. My life does not begin when I graduate in three months. My life started 18 years ago, so why has it taken me so long to realize that?
This trip led me to decide that no matter where life takes me, I will work everyday to be proactive in doing what makes me happy. No longer will I look toward tomorrow for answers. I will spend this time of transition and waiting to do things that make me happy. In doing so, I believe God will lead me to the incredible things he has planned for me. We are not given life to just throw it away waiting for something good to happen, so make each day you live meaningful and love without fear of tomorrow.
“For you will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not”Cat Stevens